Far be it from me to admire the work of John Mayer. However, he really did some incisive Twittering on the subject of Michael Jackson recently, and this IS the internet (technically) so props must be propered:

From John Mayer's Twitter page:

Can't stop thinking, what if the internet had been around when Thriller came out?

about 8 hours ago from web

Message board: "I don't know, maybe I'm just used to the demo of 'Billie Jean' that leaked, but the final version seems 'off' to me."

about 8 hours ago from web

"OffDWall78, MJ is going to reach a lot more people with this record. It sucks that he won't be 'ours' anymore, but good for him."

about 8 hours ago from web

"So far, after my first listen, 'Thriller' is my least favorite song on the album. It just seems, I don't know, overproduced."

about 8 hours ago from web

(ht: Idolator)

(from stereogum.com)

Listen, I know a lot of stuff happened this weekend having to do with Michael Jackson and his horrible problems and stuff, but for me, the only thing of note was that the reunited Blur headlined the Glastonbury festial, which is like the British Coachella, only older and with better music, and I WASN'T THERE. Fortunately, the British press was. Or, as they would say, were.

From NME:

Blur have closed 2009's Glastonbury festival in spectacular fashion tonight (June 28) with a career-spanning set. Topping the bill on the Pyramid Stage on the final night of this year's event, frontman Damon Albarn greeted the crowd as they kicked the set off with their first single 'She's So High'.

"Wow, there's a lot of people here!" shouted the singer as he surveyed one of the weekend's biggest crowds, before the band powered into 'Girls And Boys'.

"I'm enjoying this," declared Albarn midway through the set. "Thank you!"

The feeling was clearly mutual, with the crowd singing along to practically ever song, although Number One single 'Country House' drew especially loud applause from the crowd. Actor Phil Daniels emerged onstage offering Glastonbury "a bit of 'Parklife'".

"This is the fourth time we've played here," said Albarn ahead of the song. "It's really, really fantastic!" The band then rounded off action on the Pyramid Stage with an epic version of 'The Universal' that had the whole field singing along.

"Take care, goodnight," Albarn told the crowd as he and his bandmates left the stage for the final time.

Blur played:

'She's So High'

'Girls And Boys'

'Tracy Jacks'

'There's No Other Way'

'Jubilee'

'Badhead'

'Beetlebum'

'Out Of Time'

'Trimm Trabb'

'Coffee And TV'

'Tender'

'Country House'

'Oily Water'

'Chemical World'

'Sunday Sunday'

'Parklife'

'End Of A Century'

'To The End'

'This Is A Low'

'Popscene'

'Advert'

'Song 2'

'For Tomorrow'

'The Universal'

I now return you to speculation about Michael Jackson's drug and sex habits.

Heartfelt blog tributes aside, I think this article from Billboardmore or less says it all about Michael Jackson's death:

Sony, Retailers Make Push On Jackson Inventory

June 26, 2009 - Rock and Pop | Retail

By Cortney Harding, N.Y.

Michael Jackson is arguably the biggest star to die during the SoundScan era and its expected that his physical catalog, much like his digital sales, will receive a huge sales boost next week from his untimely death.

Retailers and Sony Music are anticipating the rush and working to ensure Jackson's catalog is available in stores. Sources at Sony tell Billboard that more than one million copies of his albums have been ordered by retail outlets around the country since last night. Employees at Sony's pressing plants in Pitman, N.J., and Terre Haute, Ind., are being told to plan on overtime work as the plants will be running over the weekend.

And what type of sales boost is expected? After Nirvana frontman Kurt Cobain committed suicide in 1994, sales of Nirvana's "Nevermind" rose from 7,000 the week before his death to 20,000 the week of his death to 35,000 the week after his death, according to Nielsen SoundScan. Nirvana's "In Utero" went from 18,000 to 40,000 to 60,000.

After rapper Tupac Shakur was killed, sales of his best-selling album, "All Eyez on Me," went from 16,000 to 56,000 to 76,000. When rapper Notorious BIG was killed, he had just released an album; sales of his previous album, "Ready to Die," went from 3,000 to 10,000 to 12,000.

Finally, when Frank Sinatra died in 1998, sales of "Very Good Years" went from 4,000 to 18,000 to 30,000.

Ghoulish.

Michael Jackson, dead at 50.

No doubt, a lot will be written and said, and some will be not nice, and some will be shocking. But Jackson was one of the greatest of all time. And a human being, too. So for now, respect.

 

Not-famously-intentionally-humorous '70s-'80s (and apparently '90s and '00s) band Styx somehow got let into the White House briefing room and made a funny (to them) viral video.

From Rollingstone.com:

Styx made a surprise appearance at the White House Briefing Room in Washington, DC, yesterday after press secretary Robert Gibbs ended his daily briefing, the Huffington Post reports. The band was in town for tonight’s concert at the Merriweather Post Pavilion in Columbia, Maryland, and spent their day off taking a private tour of the president’s mansion.

When asked whether Styx had plans to meet President Obama while they were at the White House, keyboardist Lawrence Gowan joked, “If I have time.”

What wasn't revealed is that President Obama flatly refused to meet with the band members—not because he was too busy, but because he's a die-hard fan of Dennis DeYoung, the original Styx vocalist and golden throat behind such gems as "Come Sail Away," "Babe," "The Best of Times," and "Mr. Roboto." DyYoung no longer tours with Styx, for a variety of reasons. Taste may or may not be among them.

One of Seattle's lesser-known-but-majorly-influential bands (dude, they only practically invented emo) has done what all bands that were ever heard by more than a thousand people must ultimately do: Sunny Day Real Estate has reunited for a tour in honor of the Sub Pop reissues of their first two albums. They already broke up and reformed once before, but this time, it's personal. (Which means original bassist Nate Mendel, late of Foo Fighters, is back on-board; it's also the tag line from Jaws IV: The Revenge, in which the shark supposedly follows the wife of Sherriff Brody (Lorraine Gary) all the way to the Caribbean specifically to target her and her family for watery death—kind of unrealistic, but I'll watch just about anything with Michael Caine in it.) Because I fear that some of you will not be familiar with the band—though you certainly know its legacy—and also because I fear I have nothing to add to it, here is what the label has to say about SDRE 3.0, including tour dates:

Following a more than 10 year hiatus, all four original members of pioneering Seattle rock band Sunny Day Real Estate will regroup for a 20-date US tour starting Sept. 17th, 2009. In addition, Sub Pop Records will re-issue both Diary and the band’s second full-length album, commonly known as LP2 (or “The Pink Album” for its entirely pink cover). Both re-mastered albums will include rare bonus tracks as well as newly written liner notes and will be released on both CD and LP Sept. 15, 2009, just prior to the start of the tour. Tour dates are below.

Diary, LP2 and the Sunny Day Real Estate Reunion

Originally formed in Seattle in 1992, Sunny Day Real Estate featured Nate Mendel (bass), William Goldsmith (drums), Dan Hoerner (guitar,vocals) and Jeremy Enigk (vocals, guitar). Diary, the band’s first full-length album, was released in 1994 on Sub Pop, going on to become the seventh-best selling record in the label’s history with more than 231,000 copies scanned in the US alone. Diary was recorded at Chicago’s Idful Studios with producer Brad Wood and released to critical acclaim. Following the completion of a US Tour to support the debut release, the group headed back into the studio with Wood to record the follow-up.

But during the recording sessions, internal tensions splintered Sunny Day Real Estate, resulting in a sudden break-up and the finished album being turned in to Sub Pop without a title or artwork. LP2 was released in November 1995, by which time both Goldsmith and Mendel had joined Foo Fighters and Enigk had begun a solo career. Without Mendel, Sunny Day Real Estate reunited in 1997 and released two more studio albums (the 1998 Sub Pop release How It Feels to Be Something On and in 2000 The Rising Tide on Time Bomb) before disbanding again in 2001. Sunny Day Real Estate’s influence has grown exponentially since the band’s initial split.

“I wasn’t around for the second version of the band that recorded the 3rd and 4th albums, so I’ve always had a feeling of unfinished business there,” Mendel explains. “We had all these outsized ideas back then, ‘Everyone’s going to learn a new instrument,’ and ‘Let’s do a rock opera,’ but before we could get anywhere with them, the band broke up. We left behind all these weird and beautiful songs, though, and they’ve stuck with me all this time. I’m really happy that we get a chance to play them together again.”

Sunny Day Real Estate Fall 2009 US Tour

September 17th Vancouver, BC/Commodore Ballroom

September 18th Portland/Crystal Ballroom (Musicfest NW)

September 20th Salt Lake City/Murray Theater

September 21st Denver/Ogden Theater

September 23rd Minneapolis/First Avenue

September 24th Chicago/Metro

September 25th Detroit/St Andrews Hall

September 27th New York/Terminal 5

September 28th Boston/House of Blues

September 30th Washington DC/930 Club

October 1st Philadelphia/Trocadero

October 3rd Atlanta/CW Center Stage

October 5th Dallas/Granada Theater

October 6th Houston/Warehouse Live

October 7th Austin/La Zona Rosa

October 9th Tempe/Marquee Theatre

October 10th Anaheim/House of Blues

October 11th Los Angeles/Henry Fonda Theater

October 13th San Francisco/Fillmore

October 15th Spokane/Knitting Factory

October 16th Seattle/Paramount Theatre

Additional information can be found on the band’s official website:

www.sunnydayrealestate.fm or at http://www.subpop.com/artists/sunny_day_real_estate

Well, the first question I have is: How did he manage to score 'Billy' as his username? Surely he's not the only William using that abbreviation. Secondly: I know this is a slightly unfair recontextualization, given the way Twitter works, but still: Read this chain of tweets from Billy Corgan, once and future Smashing Pumpkin, and see if you can detect the slightest trace of narcissistic 'round-the-bendness mixed with the classic career-in-dumps-find-religion gambit. OK, GO:

Because YOU are absolutely worth it *wink*

about 3 hours ago from txt

I want everyone to know I've sold out; to Jesus and Mother Mary, to Love and Grace. Oh, and to YOU, for YOU, and by YOU.

about 4 hours ago from txt

Trust the Divine Plan whatever happens, however it happens.

5:59 PM Jun 20th from txt

Or one could rephrase that as 'today's wrong is often tomorrow's rite of passage'.

8:57 PM Jun 17th from txt

Today's wrong is often tomorrow's right.

8:48 PM Jun 17th from txt

A friend once told me when they were sad they texted God. They would text to 'g-o-d' in the phone + write their peace.

11:17 PM Jun 16th from txt

Trust is a decision that must be made from within.

9:20 AM Jun 16th from txt

Love triumphs over all, always...it's really just an issue of patience. Lots and lots of patience.

8:41 AM Jun 13th from txt

I am happy to know you.

6:19 PM Jun 11th from txt

That being said, I do believe God does not love the Dodgers. He is obviously a Cubs fan, hence the Eternal Suffering...

11:06 PM May 31st from web

Joe Torre is really a great manager. I had the honor of shaking his hand once when he with the Yankees. It's time he gets his just due.

6:57 PM May 31st from web

GOD is in every-thing from here to there...

3:16 PM May 28th from txt

At lunch with Kidman, Holmes, Posh, Tequila, and God...

1:38 PM May 22nd from txt

Choose Love and see what happens...

8:38 AM May 22nd from txt

The blessings of the new day are intrinsically connected to the potential of what is possible...

8:37 AM May 22nd from txt

As I write this, I cannot hear any birds, but I would like to...

8:47 AM May 20th from txt

The trick in life is always just to do the next best thing...

11:51 AM May 18th from txt

Today is a beautiful day. Every day that we are alive is the greatest day! I stole that from my Father I think.

12:10 PM May 16th from txt

Question of the day: is Carina Round 'God' on Earth?? Beautiful show last night with Sierra Swan.

12:00 PM May 14th from txt

And Happy Mothers Day to all the mommys out there!

11:57 AM May 10th from txt

If God does have a sense of humor, that would mean the jokes will never stop being funny...

10:22 AM May 10th from txt

I believe in blue skies

3:58 PM May 7th from txt

Do pirates go to heaven??

9:37 AM May 7th from txt

The day itself is a prayer...

9:05 AM May 5th from txt

In the circle of Love that we find ourselves in, I send you only blessings of Joy.

6:50 AM May 5th from txt

Unity consciousness is all-inclusive. It accounts for the successful ascesion of every-thing: every-rock, animal, wish+ lover gone bad

9:22 PM Apr 29th from txt

If God is Love and Love is Truth than anything not born of Love or Truth is not born of God.

8:07 PM Apr 28th from txt

God is everywhere except the airport.

7:20 AM Apr 27th from txt

Sometimes God is as simple as saying I AM. Love is only complex if you will not forgive.

6:41 AM Apr 25th from txt

Actually, I got that wrong. Happiness is yours, if you want it. Peace is yours if you choose it.

8:43 AM Apr 23rd from txt

Happiness is yours, if you want it. Peace is yours, if you need it.

8:42 AM Apr 23rd from txt

Anything that you can see or touch or dream of represents active consciousness that IS Love.

6:40 AM Apr 22nd from txt

You must first fill your cup with love before you can pour it into the cup of another.

11:20 AM Apr 20th from txt

We are never alone. We are never a-lone one.

10:58 AM Apr 19th from txt

Life is a wonderful opportunity

10:52 AM Apr 18th from txt

A fan asked me tonight, 'is the God stuff real?'. When is God ever not real? Tell me...

8:33 PM Apr 17th from txt

When, indeed?

At last! The internet gives me something I need! The invaluable, exhaustive Wolfgang's Vault live concert archive has posted a full recording of the Sex Pistols final show at Winterland in San Francisco, 1978. Unsurprisingly, it's not the greatest performance of all time, and the recording is a little guitar shy (you can hear a lot of Sid Vicious's bass playing, and, frankly, it's not so bad). HOWEVER, this legendary show has been written about so much, and had so much historical freight thrust upon it that—like Dylan's Judas concert—to hear it is to travel through time and discover that so much of rock lore is simply wishful thinking on the part of eager mythmakers. The fact that the Pistols were so shocking to the rock establishment says a lot more about the times (and said rock establishment) than it does about the band. Still, it's always fun hearing Johnny Rotten say anything between songs, especially famous lines like his final utterance, and, just before it, the encore announcement: "you'll get one number and one number only 'cause I'm a lazy bastard." The fact that they didn't know any other songs was incidental.

Listen to the Sex Pistols final show in its entirety here.

As MSN Music visitors are no doubt aware, the CMA Music Festival (the Country Music flesh press formerly known as Fan Fair) swarmed Nashville all last week. But it is now over, having culminated in a show by Kenny Chesney, Taylor Swift, Montgomery Gentry, Miranda Lambert, and several other artists who know how to tell their fans how important they are (ambiguity intentional).

According to CMT.com:

With Kenny Chesney's "She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy" still ringing in their ears, tens of thousands of fans at Nashville's LP Field bid a weary farewell Sunday night (June 14) to the 2009 CMA Music Festival.

Chesney, who didn't take the stage until midnight, topped a bill that also featured Taylor Swift, Sugarland, John Rich, Miranda Lambert, Montgomery Gentry, Heidi Newfield and Jack Ingram.

Unlike most closing nights, there was little crowd erosion as the evening ticked on. Everybody wanted to stay and see Chesney. And he made the wait worthwhile, starting with the inciting "Beer in Mexico" and steaming ahead to such party fare as "Summertime," "Out Last Night," "Young" and "Living in Fast Forward."

He dedicated the nostalgic "I Go Back" to his first producer, Barry Beckett, who died last week, calling him "a very important guy in music [who's] moved to the other side."

Risking being mauled by frantically outstretched hands, Chesney sat on the lip of the stage to croon the grateful "Don't Happen Twice." Then he leaped up, ran to center stage and started his "Tractor."

Read all about the rest of the show right cheer.

This year, and particularly this summer, marks the 25th anniversary of the first best thing Prince ever did, the film and soundtrack album known simply as Purple Rain. Over at the July issue of Spin (yes, it still exists!) there is a dedicated celebration of the silver anniversary that includes the now de rigueur practice of compiling a tribute album of bands most people have never heard of (including Of Montreal, Lavender Diamond, Craig Wedren from Shudder to Think, Sharon Jones & the Dap Kings, and others) covering Prince's indelible songs, available for free download one week from tomorrow on June 23. At the top of the list of Purplish Rain stands Greg Dulli, formerly of Afghan Whigs, currently of Twilight Singers (and occasionally of Gutter Twins), duetting on the immortal "When Doves Cry" with none other than Prince's co-star and eternal lust object to those who came of age during the summer of "Rain," Apollonia Kotero, or as I call her, Apollonia.

Said Dulli, "It was a fun challenge. I can guarantee you that what we do sounds nothing like what you expect. The only thing you'll recognize is the lyrics."

Stream the track exclusively and find all about the album download details here.

If you know anything about early '80s Canadian metal, or brilliant 2009 music documentaries, then you know: Anvil has been at it for a long, long, LONG time. And now, thanks to the mega success of that documentary (Sacha Gervasi's Anvil: The Story of Anvil), things are finally starting to go their way. They'll be opening for AC/DC at Giants Stadium, doing lots of other personal appearances in association with the brilliant film's release, and even getting praise from Coldplay (a band you absolutely know they would HATE). Details are below, but the question that isn't answered, or even addressed, is: how long before all the people who are enthusiastic about supporting the band notice the music? Time will tell.

Billboard has the details, and Stereogum has some relevant vids:

Anvil, the Canadian heavy metal band that spent more than 30 years in near obscurity before the documentary about its struggles became a surprise hit, is getting the ultimate rock and roll salute this summer. AC/DC, arguably the most successful hard rock band in history, has personally selected Anvil as the sole support act for two arena shows -- July 28 at Gillette Stadium in Boston and July 31 at Giants Stadium in New Jersey.

The stadium shows will mark a new chapter in Anvil's late-blooming fame.

"Anvil: The Story Of Anvil," the documentary directed by teenage roadie turned screenwriter Sacha Gervasi, made its debut at the 2008 Sundance Film Festival and opened in theaters in New York and Los Angeles in March. The theatrical run has currently expanded to 27 cities and there are plans to double that number over the summer, with an estimated 150-200 total play dates on tap. The film has already grossed more than $550,000 at the box office in the United States alone, a huge success for an independently distributed documentary.

Since March, the band has played more than 30 concerts - dubbed the Anvil Experience - at sold-out film screenings across the country, including two gigs last week in Los Angeles and New York that saw hundreds of people turned away at the door.

Aside from AC/DC, Anvil has found a wellspring of support from fellow musicians who have fallen in love with the film. Chris Martin of Coldplay, who came to last week's New York Anvil Experience and gave the band a standing ovation upon their return to the Bowery Hotel, has been a major advocate. In an interview published on Coldplay's website, Martin calls the film "brilliant...wonderful," and adds, "There's a scene in it between the drummer and the singer which makes you cry, especially if you're in a band and you know what it feels like to love another man so much, but also fight so much."

Anvil next heads to the U.K. (where the film was the top-grossing rock documentary in the country's history and was recently released on DVD) this weekend for a stage-headlining slot at the celebrated heavy metal Download Festival. The band is also booked for the Rocklahoma Festval in Oklahoma on July 9-12, where it will share the stage with groups like Ratt, Anthrax, Twisted Sister and dozens of others.

The film's U.S. DVD release is now scheduled for the fall, at least three months later than originally planned due to the overwhelming response from moviegoers. VH1, which is releasing the DVD and has sponsored the Anvil Experience live shows, will give the film its broadcast debut on the network and a national Anvil Experience tour of major markets is planned for the week of the DVD release. A soundtrack and book deal are in the works, as well as the release of three newly-recorded Anvil tracks for the Rock Band video game. VH1 Records is also looking to give the band's thirteenth album, "This Is Thirteen," an official release at the end of August.

Internationally, the film screened at the Cannes Film Festival and will see theatrical distribution on all major territories throughout Europe, Asia, and even the Middle East. The movie opens in Australia in August and Japan in October. The band is expected to bring the Anvil Experience to as many of the countries as its schedule will allow.

In a tearful speech following last week's New York screening, director Gervasi best summed up the band's newfound recognition. "Anvil taught me something...never f--king give up, never surrender," he said.

"I'm just so proud of this band," he told the joyful crowd of supporters. "Will you please help me turn Anvil into f--king rock stars?"

This is something no one would have seen coming: a collaboration between pop idol Christina Aguilera and feminist electro trio LeTigre, which is led by Kathleen Hanna, formerly of '90s punk legends Bikini Kill. It's also, as the Guardian blogger who delivered the scoop indicates, kind of exciting to imagine, right? I mean at first glance, this pairing makes no sense, since Aguilera's talent seems to be driven by a thirst for the biggest possible audience while LeTigre is on a defiantly indie/underground trajectory (even though they made a failed attempt at going big for their major label debut). But then you remember all the times people in Aguilera's position have vampired on the coolness of people like LeTigre and you're all, ahhhhh... Nonetheless, both sides make music that's a lot more interesting than people give credit for, so what they do together will be something worth waiting for.

From the Guardian:

I haven't been this excited since those "Sleater-Kinney collaborate with Beyoncé" and "Fannypack: our love for Jordin Sparks" stories. And since they never actually happened, that means I haven't been this excited for, well, quite a while. You see, not only have the arty feminist electro-poppers Le Tigre gone back on their rumoured break-up, they're also working with Christina Aguilera on her new album.

It's a brilliantly odd pairing. Though they tried to be pop with their last album and major label debut, 2004's This Island, Le Tigre never managed to crack the mainstream. One of their best-known songs is still Hot Topic, an indie-disco staple circa 2001 that's a rundown of their idols and heroines, namechecking Angela Davis, Gertrude Stein and James Baldwin. They had a song about whether the director John Cassavetes was sexist and another about the importance of butch lesbian visibility. Whether they'll be writing Xtina's lyrics remains to be seen.

But they've picked an apt moment to return, because the DIY electro-pop they were peddling way back in 2000 is now all over the place. Katie White from the Ting Tings says Le Tigre were a huge inspiration to their music, and you can hear it in the Ting Tings' sing-song sound. Beth Ditto told me recently how heartbroken she was that Le Tigre weren't around any more, so no doubt she'll be ecstatic to discover they were just having a rest. It's the perfect time for them to get their dues.

Hooking up with Aguilera is a giant step forward in that direction, and it could be a mutually beneficial arrangement. Aguilera has also picked the brains of Ladytron and Goldfrapp for her album (pencilled in for release in September), and unless they're swapping their synths for jazzy trumpets, it should mean she's moving away from the dated retro-swing of Back to Basics. By working with Le Tigre, she picks up a kind of credibility, and by hitching a ride on the Xtina train, Le Tigre get the attention they missed out on first time around. I can't wait to hear what they come up with.

Uhhh... it's hard to know even what to say about this news of Michael Jackson's request (which means demand) for a mixed race choir of kids aged 5-13 who can sing and do sign language before he'll perform his upcoming 50-date residency at London's O2 Arena. Like, do you say "I wonder what else he wants them to do"? Or do you say, "Gosh, I bet that would sound lovely"? Or do you say, "I wonder how many psycho stage parents are forcing their kids to learn sign language at this very moment." Or maybe there's something else to say? Something about old habits dying hard? And this is all without taking into account his request for six young snare drummers. HELLO?

From The Mirror:

Michael Jackson has thrown his comeback in to chaos with bizarre demands for his child choir.

In emails seen by the Mirror, the singer wants every youngster able to do sign language.

The weird request was sent to casting agents on behalf of promoters AEG Live, who are behind the 50 dates at London’s O2 Arena.

Jacko, 50, also wants the child singers to be made up of “exactly equal” numbers of black, white, mixed-race and Asian children.

And, even weirder, Jacko is also after six marching snare drummers who are banned from having beards. The wacky email insists the drummers must be “young adults, clean-cut and of mixed ethnicity”.

It adds: “They must be real drummers so please do not waste our time suggesting people who are not.”

The child choir must be made up of kids ranging from five to 13.

Auditions are next week in London and the children are being paid for their time. The email states: “No past professional experience is necessary...due to children’s work permit laws we will cast more than one choir.”

But a source close to the promoters told the Mirror the demands have caused a “logistical nightmare”.

An insider said: “Normally when we cast choirs for acts, it’s quite a laborious task.

“But in this case, it’s proving a near impossibility. Jacko is a perfectionist and wants it exactly right and that means every child being able to do sign language.

“AEG are desperate to keep Jacko happy and so are pulling out all the stops to make it happen. But it’s a race against time.”

But over in Los Angeles, the singer’s rehearsals said to be going well.

See also:

Bob Dylan is old.

Phil Spector is guilty.

Morrissey is bummed.

Rihanna is foxy.

Axl Rose is bonkers.

Clay Aiken is, too.

Insert your own.

Bret Michaels, current reality TV groupie selector and once-and-future lead singer of fake metal hair band Poison, inexplicably performed on the Tony Awards last night. Then he inexplicably walked into a descending piece of set, which, quite explicably, knocked him to the ground. Michaels was injured, but not seriously. The ironies are many, including of course, the fact that Michaels had, only seconds earlier, sang the words "don't need nothing but a good time, and it don't get better than this." But the bottom line is that if I had known I'd be able to see one of the worst people in rock (saying something) get clocked by furniture on national TV, I might have watched the Tonys in the first place!

 

 

Evan Dando is suing General Motors for stealing his best song and putting it in an ad. Actually, I say it's his best song, but it's really the only song of his I like. That's him singing it on TV above. Others may be partial to "Into Your Arms" or "My Drug Buddy" or some other Lemonheads song. Whatever the case. "Ray" certainly deserves better than being in a stupid car commercial. Doesn't GM have enough problems without copping an Evan Dando song without paying and turning it into a whistling jingle? See below for the apparent answer:

 

Or, in this case, play banjo:

 

From Opry.com:

Multi-talented Emmy Award-winning actor/comedian/writer Steve Martin made his Grand Ole Opry debut tonight in front of a sold-out crowd and was greeted with a standing ovation. He performed songs from his first music album, The Crow – New Songs for the Five-String Banjo. Life-long friend John McEuen (Nitty Gritty Dirt Band), who produced the album and assembled an all-star cast to record with Martin, appeared on the show along with Vince Gill, Amy Grant, Stuart Duncan, Tim O’Brien, and more. After playing the scheduled songs the group was called back out for an encore and Martin lead the group on “Foggy Mountain Breakdown” to the crowds delight.

Comedy is not pretty.

James Murphy, better known (though not terribly well known, apparently) as the mastermind behind LCD Soundsystem, got to go to the MTV Movie Awards as the guest of standup comic and indie rock enthusiast Aziz Ansari, better known (and increasingly only known) as the guy from that new NBC comedy Parks and Recreation. He then wrote a dry and funny blog post about his experience as the least famous guy in a room full of semi-famous-to-incredibly-famous people like Will Ferrell, Ben Stiller, and Jim Carrey.

To wit:

i was very hungover today, mainly because i drank a lot of drinks with alcohol in them yesterday. i accompanied my tv star friend to the mtv movie awards because it seemed like the most hilariously hollywood thing i could possibly do right then, and wound up at times pretending to be either his publicist or body guard, which was very funny. i also ate a lot of these skewers with a shrimp and a green olive on them. they were good, but not substantial enough really to soak up the shitty free beer that they have at these things.

while at the awards, i learned a few things:

1. will ferrell is very nice in person, and must be exhausted with how much effort he puts in to seeming like a decent, regular guy. i met him very quickly and he was so absurdly nice that i felt like a dick for all the times i was wooden and awkward with strangers at a festival or something.

2. danny mcbride is fucking hilarious. and pretty much like you expect.

3. eminem is a better actor than you think.

4. pr people and "young hollywood" seem like, literally, different species of animal.

5. young, self-satisfied, confident celebrities are weird to be near.

6. the more excited young people are about an actor/actress, the less likely i am to recognize them. there is an inverse relationship formula for volume-of-screaming to person-i-recognize that i'm working on.

7. jason 'mayhem' miller has a very large head. and that's coming from ME.

8. talking for 2 minutes with ben stiller about something totally unrelated to the mtv movie awards while at the mtv movie awards makes people audibly say "who is that talking to stiller??" in total, unselfconscious earshot of the subject (me) while said subject (still me) walks back to the bar area. they'll actually point.

8b. being at an event thrown by a company called "music television" pretty much ensures that you will not be recognized by anyone at all except for the people you show up with, previously know, and danny mcbride.

9. comedians are funny in person, but not the way you think.

10. hollywood likes to stratify, and being the +1 of a tv personality makes you pretty low on the list, but if you've just said hi to will ferrell, and he looked at you in some way that could be interpreted as "familiar"--largely because he's kind, and you blurted something about him using "north american scum" in "stepbrothers"--you can basically walk into any room you want and take beer for the next 5 minutes. it's like getting an invincibility pill in pac-man. you can feel the power start to blink after you cruise out with 4 beers from the 3rd dressing room, so you should probably head back to your friends and share the beers.

11. chris isaacs likes his dog.

12. forest whittaker is disarmingly friendly.

13. i, as a person, am oddly frightened (i'm saying frightened here--not intimidated) by jim carey.

i think like being a largely anonymous dude in a weird band that most people don't know about. it's nice. i wouldn't want to be a movie star. i mean, i feel like i knew that, but it's good to have your feelings validated like that once in a while. because it's easy to sit back and say "i wouldn't want to be a movie star" when it's totally not a salient point... but being there, with everything seeming so easy for them, still didn't make me want any of it. except the free stuff.

You can read the rest of his observations right here, in the MySpace.

I know it's unbecoming to brag, but I received an e-mail from Morrissey yesterday, and while I suppose it's technically "true," that millions of other people got it as well, it still sent a tiny little frisson down my spine. If I could somehow get a hold of my teenage self, who thought Morrissey was singing directly to me on his solo records and those of The Smiths, he would be SO jealous.

We Will Resume

I am very pleased to confirm that we will resume at Luxembourg this coming Friday (5 June), absorbed and collected. I have been reconstructed by a Wiltshire hospital and I am as close to good health as I'm likely to get.

I apologize to everyone caught up in the to-ing and fro-ing, but the disappointment of postponement is less than the disappointment of hearing me sing on one engine.

I should stress that nothing has been canceled. The four London concerts are repositioned in July, and both Birmingham and the Royal Albert Hall are October fixtures. I've endured a titanic struggle against an intolerable virus lately, and although Hull, Hartlepool and Manchester were nights that comprised a whole life, the physical limits were reached. False notes crush the soul.

Besides Luxembourg and beyond, I am excited about the October release of Swords, which is an 18-track compilation of b-side of singles from the last three albums. This will be a Polydor release.

Thanks to everyone who bought 'Years of Refusal'. We were the number one seller in the UK for the week of release, but, as with 'You Are The Quarry' and 'Your Arsenal', we were booted off the number one spot on the last hour of the final day. We cried.

I would like to point out that some passable creature is using my name and sending sharply chiseled replies to people via Twitter, MySpace and Facebook. This person is not me. Not enough happens in my life that I would wish to share it with others. I do not scan these sites - or whatever they are - so I can only hope that whoever is posing as me is at least worth talking to. Beware of false imitations.

Thanks for reading these unvarnished facts, and thanks for giving us some greatly enjoyable nights on the Refusal tour.

Absolutely Yours, Morrissey.

Even though reality TV has put the lie to Ozzy Osbourne's "prince of effing darkness" persona for good and all, it remains a safe assumption that his legal team is still a force to be feared. Which is why this cease and desist letter from Osbourne, warning his old Black Sabbath bandmate Tony Iommi to stop selling Sabbath-related merchandise without cutting Ozzy in on the proceeds, has a whiff about it of, if not brimstone, then certainly something you don't want to run afoul of. Maybe it's the "we're still buddies, right?" tone. Or perhaps I'm being paranoid.

From HuffPo:

"Tony, I am so sorry it's had to get to this point by me having to take this action against you," the singer-turned-reality show star said.

But, he added, "we've all worked too hard and long in our careers to allow you to sell merchandise that features all our faces, old Black Sabbath album covers and band logos, and then you tell us that you own the copyright."

Osbourne, who lives in California, filed suit Tuesday in a federal court in New York, saying Iommi falsely claimed to have sole rights to Black Sabbath's trademark in negotiations over the last year with a company that sells the band's merchandise. As a result, the lawsuit says, Osbourne has lost royalties formerly split 50/50.

The lawsuit seeks unspecified damages, lost profits and a declaration that Osbourne is a half-owner of the trademark.

Iommi's representative and lawyers who have represented him didn't immediately respond to telephone and e-mail messages late Friday.

Osbourne's lawsuit reads at times like liner notes to a greatest-hits album, describing the case as "a dispute concerning one of the most famous and valuable names in the history of rock and roll."

"To fans of heavy metal music," Osbourne's lawsuit says, "Ozzy has become synonymous with Black Sabbath."

But Iommi, considered one of heavy metal's guitar greats, noted in a separate lawsuit filed against the merchandise firm in December that he has been the only constant member in the English band's 41-year history. Court records show that lawsuit, which doesn't involve Osbourne, was settled Wednesday on undisclosed terms.

Iommi, who registered the Black Sabbath trademark in the U.S. in 2000, also said in the lawsuit that co-founders Osbourne, bassist Geezer Butler and drummer Bill Ward legally relinquished rights to the band's name in the 1980s.

Osbourne's lawyer disputed that in a January letter included with his lawsuit, saying that even if the singer did make such an agreement he took a major role in the band's direction and success after rejoining it in 1997.

Osbourne, who in recent years has appeared as the paterfamilias of an erratic clan on MTV's "The Osbournes," said in Friday's statement that he believes all four original members should share Black Sabbath's name equally.

"I hope," he said, "that by me taking this first step that it will ultimately end up that way."